You would think that being in the 21st century, the unrealistic ‘ideal’ of what a sexy, beautiful and perfect woman looks like would have been put to bed, along with the perception of, if you don’t replicate this, you don’t make the cut, but in reality, that does not seem to be the case. I cannot wait for the time where in my culture, women are able to embrace their body image and love themselves rather than looking in the mirror and loathing their reflection.
It’s time that we put our middle fingers up to all the false representations, stereotypes and ideals and find our inner self appreciation for who we are as individuals. All of us together, not taking the time out of our busy schedules to allow the negative portrayals and derogatory pattern in the media to phase us and then, we make a stand for change.
The Body Image Movement established by Taryn Brumfitt is all about shaping a difference. Originally set up in America, and now expanding globally, it influences women positively and gets them to embrace their bodies, signifying love and self-confidence. Speaking to one of the UK’s ambassadors for the movement, Alice Morris, 24, she identifies how even through somewhat minor acts, we can all start influencing a change in the perceptions of ourselves.
“Filter the way you see the world. Unfollow the accounts on social media, who make you feel negative about yourself and you constantly compare yourself to. Be your own role model.” Perhaps a simpler way of beginning to love yourself is acknowledging what you love about your body, but before that somewhat challenging task, identifying what you love about yourself as an individual could be the place to start. Alice said: “Join movements that help enforce change, that help young women and girls change the way they think and see themselves. Loving your true self, flaws and imperfects to help inspire others to love themselves.”
The significance of loving your true self is where to begin, the idea of self-appreciation and loving yourself, for you, but then does that imply there is a false self? With the way of the world and how the majority of us (even though we probably wouldn’t admit it) constantly compare ourselves to every image that bombards us over social media, magazines or even advertisements, does this mean that we are subconsciously doing the damage to our identities in constructing this fake self on our own accord? Although it’s a possibility, the perceptions of beauty have been marginalized for so long, it’s not unexpected or unbelievable that women feel inadequate or self-loathing of themselves and their bodies and so try to alter themselves to fit in. Some may see loving yourself as ultimately narcissistic, but self-love is the act of taking care of yourself and it’s about time that we stop tormenting ourselves and change our perceptions, tell our mind that we’re beautiful and mean it. How can having pride in yourself and appreciating the body that enables you to live your life be labelled narcissistic? Narcissism connotes selfishness and arrogance. There’s nothing selfish about being comfortable in your own skin, own it with elegance and integrity.
The empowerment of women is ever changing, the battle isn’t completed but it’s a work in progress. We were told for so long what to be and who to be, that rubbish doesn’t stick anymore. It’s so empowering to take control of yourself, appreciate yourself and to ultimately break away from the general consensus of what society deems as beauty. We have the power to be whomever and whatever we like, the foundation of being comfortable with yourself and to start self-loving, brings an empowerment that sets your mind to achieving anything.
I watch children be derogatory about the way they look, worrying that they’re getting ‘fat’ because apparently fat constitutes as being ‘ugly’. When they’re at that impressionable age where everything you do or say about yourself as a sister, a mother or a cousin reflects in influencing them and the ways in which they see themselves. We should be teaching the younger generations, teaching them that it’s what’s on the inside, not out. Teaching them to embrace their ‘quirks’ and to not waste a second on worrying about their looks, their lives should be full of fun, life and laughter, not anxiety over their bodies and appearances. In the future, I pray that when I have children we’ll be closer to a viewpoint in society which embraces everybody for who they are and not what it deems as being acceptable. I’ll make it my duty to empower my daughter or son, to embrace their imperfections and change the way they are on their own accord for good reason, not because of some hyped up, constructed ideology which tarnishes their true identity and obligates the feeling of inadequacy.
As a society we have seemed to come to the point where we care too much about what other people think. The majority of us have to be accepted and liked by everyone, we won’t upload a photo on social media unless it’s the right angle, the right lighting and we’ve got a full face of makeup on. The fear of rejection and judgement is too much and so we feel obliged to conform. Conform, conform, conform…oh and conform again. That way you won’t get judged and you’ll be accepted, bully for you, well done, here’s your Blue Peter badge. Oh, but hold on a second…even though you’ve conformed, you’ll still get judged anyway, because your contour is too dark, your drawn-on eyebrows don’t match and hold on I’m sorry, but that style was so last week, so sorry babe, please try again.
It’s hard to see the light sometimes, because it’s almost as we are all damned if we do and damned if we don’t, but the key is just making yourself happy, content and not caring what other people think. At the end of the day, you’re not asking them to live your life and the majority of the time the people who are judgmental have no real significance to our lives anyway. So, who cares? I say amen to that.
It may seem contradictory to self-love and appreciate when we’re sticking a middle finger up to the unrealistic ideals of what beauty is represented as. However, the difference being that it’s about embracing a true ideal of beauty, not the digitally enhanced, unrealistic version. It’s about being content with who you are and yourself deep within. Beauty is defined as ‘the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind’. Forget the cosmetics, there’s nothing more beautiful than the mind. Embrace that beauty, embrace your thoughts and your personality. Embrace your quirkiness, your ‘flaws’ and never apologise for both your thighs rubbing together.